In high school, I was becoming more and more open to spiritual truth. I think most of it had to do with a disposition that was guided by one principle: God is actively interested in me.

It was this belief that shaped and reshaped my sense of compassion towards others and opened a door to being in tune with God on a more regular basis.

Then crisis.

Crisis has a way of making or breaking a person’s spirit. I found that over time, enough crisis and my resilience would erode. It’s like descending into survival mode. I became less and less self-aware. Almost primal on a psycho/emotional level. Without critical reflection, all we can ever be is reactionary.

When your primary mode of operation is survival, your vigor and enthusiasm for life runs dry.

It’s like walking around downtown. The sun is shining, birds chirping and you can see miles ahead of you, people all around. You blink and all you see is fog. A dense fog. Zero visibility. Everyone has disappeared. The sun is concealed by rain clouds. Without the sun you lose your bearings and forget which direction you’re headed.

As an artist, I experience the dense fog on a semi-regular basis. The funny thing about the fog is that it makes you feel guilty for not having better eye-sight or a more keen sense of direction. As soon as I begin creating something using my heart as my guide, the fog begins to lift.

I think that impulse to create is something that is divinely embedded in all of us. When I create, I open myself to possibilities. This is when I begin to rediscover my true self. This is when I remember what it is to mimic our curiously imaginative Creator. And somehow God’s interest in me reminds me that I am loved. I begin to understand what it means to abide. I remember that at the core of my being is the imago dei.

If you’re in the fog, just know that you’re not alone. Get some rest. Create something. And reflect on it.

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